Mountains, Moonshine, Monks Mackin' it, and the Fated Hydra Battle

Hello Faithful Readers,

As a quick note, since this is also my journal for when I get back home to the US, you’ll run across boring, dry reminders that are just for me to remember what exactly I did. So, if you see a few dry sentences that read like facts in a textbook, it’s just for future me.

You already read about my somewhat frustrating week last week, so now I’ll amuse you with the craziness of this weekend. Actually, Friday night was not exciting at all; I drove my friend Nick to the bus station for his overnight bus to Tokyo. Since my apartment is right　next to main train station in Hachinohe (it’s actually the last stop on the Shinkansen, the superfast bullet train to Tokyo), many times people will ask to park in my apartment’s parking lot and go to the station. Unfortunately, the Shinkansen is fairly expensive, so people take the night bus to Tokyo instead.

Saturday I hung out with Helen (now proud owner of a couch) and Seth (now proud owner of a DS). I (now proud owner of a red Frisbee) don’t have any pictures…a common theme in this blog (but I’m adding them slowly but surely, check out last week’s post for photos of the shrine). After the shopping spree, we went to Tanesashi beach. It was a bit cold, so instead of jumping in the water or playing Frisbee, we climbed rocks! It was wicked fun, I’ll definitely be back again. I had to do it barefoot, but it was worth it for such a great view of the ocean and the sense of adventure.

Alright, since I can’t convey my fun with words, I’ll just move onto the main course of this post. Zazen Meditation. I was invited by some Shichinohe JETs (Sheech for short) to go to Zazen Meditation. How could I turn that down? So, I arrived in Shich at 7 and off to the Buddhist temple we went. The monk spoke great English, and he proceeded to enlighten us about meditation.

Aside from the strict set of rules (sit on the cushion like so, bow so many times, only turn clockwise…), one thing stood out in our Gaijin minds. “When you feel me place the wooden board on your shoulder, bow and lean forward.”

“Why?”

“Because when I hit you, I do not want to …Eigo de nan desu ka?...attack…your bone.”

We must’ve looked puzzled, because he invited one of his weekly temple-goers to demonstrate. Ok, stick on the shoulder, he bends forward, and *SMACK!* The priest smacked the him on the back with his wooden board. Well, at least he was careful not to hit the bone.

Can I share with you one thing? It’s bloody hard to meditate when you’re anticipating a monk attack! The monk broke the meditation down to two 20 minute meditations. No smacking on the first 20 minutes. During our 5 minute break, he warned us that sometime during the next 20 minutes, he would hit us.

Why would he hit us, you may wonder? “To remind you that your body is in this place.” Yeah, that’s all the explanation we get.

So, he did come around hitting all of us the next round of meditation. It actually didn’t hurt that much.

After the meditation was over, they brought out all of these small tables and platters of food and drink. It was great! We all sat around just talking, drinking up beer and moonshine, eating gyoza, jelly soda (fanta+jello), fried ocra, and so on. You noticed the moonshine? Yes, the monk’s friend makes moonshine. Delicious moonshine. The woman I was sitting next to, the monk’s sister, actually lived in England for 2 years and spoke some pretty good English. Random fact of the night: the woman who ran the monk’s sister’s accommodation knew Sean Connery. Even better, Sean Connery asked her to marry him and she turned him down! Random eh?

After the surprise dinner, they wanted to take us out to karaoke. Since Shich is such a small town, the only karaoke around was in a snack bar. How to describe a snack bar… Ok, well, there are these women who work at the snack bar, right? And these women dress provocatively, ok? Now, at the snack bar, you pay a little extra for drinks for the woman, as well as a sitting charge for just being in the establishment, not to mention all of the drinks and food you buy for yourself. Now, these women don’t actually do anything. The most you will do with them is talk and maybe dance. So, you are pretty much paying for conversation and a big tease.

Apparently Japanese men don’t get frustrated by this. Especially the monk, if you catch my drift. Out of all of the Japanese men there, he was mackin’ it with two or three of the workers. He would sing a few (I’m assuming) heart-wrencing, tragic songs, and then the women would swoon. He danced with a few, had his arm around a few, and just when he was about to…I don’t know, maybe talk with them more?...he fell asleep. Yep, he passed out right on the couch. His friends/followers picked up where he left off, and as we were leaving for the night, one of them was drunkenly conducting his woman’s singing.

Brandon is about to give that sleeping monk payback for that wooden board...

So, I partied with a Buddhist monk. I don’t know how I feel about that. I always thought they would abstain from certain earthly…I don’t know, carnal pleasures? What I mean to say is, seeing the monk in plain clothes, drinking up with his arm around a few women, certainly made me view him with less marvel than I did at the beginning of the night.

Anyways, I stayed the night in Shich (no driving after the beeru), and the next morning drove back to Hach to quickly change into my hiking clothes and head for a mountain in Nanbu town (Mt. Nakuidate?)

Two of the Shich JETs from last night, along with Erin from Hach (self-dubbed, “Crazy Miss Hach”) jumped in the car, and we began our drive. Little did our group know the epic proportions of our adventure that day.

Driving to the mountain, everything seemed normal. Lush trees, rice fields, Japanese people. Everything was going according to plan. But then...

“What’s that over there?!” A DRAGON! No, it was no simple dragon, the beast had 3 great heads.

“ ‘Tis not a dragon, ‘tis a fearsome hydra!”

We had no choice. Although the road stretched out before us towards the mountain, there was no way we could battle fate. Our destiny called for us to climb to the top of the dragon and slay it.

We arrived. There was a restaurant near the beast, filled with people I only assume were hiding from the hydra in fear of their lives. We walked towards it, boldly purging any liquid fear we had at the conveniently located restrooms near said hydra.

As we drew nearer, there was a man, the first obstacle in our way. He said something in Japanese that I could only assume was “Hark, fellow travelers, save the poor children from the beast’s fearsome rule.” Erin had us all pay 400 yen, probably a “save the village relief fund.” Anyways, he let us through, and our adventure began.

We met the dragon head on, all of us running, battle-hungry, through the dragon’s mouth to rescue the children from inside its cavernous bowels.

It turns out, the dragon’s insides were constructed of metal rings with rope, allowing us to easily climb through it and to the top of the dragon. After rescuing some children, we made it to the top and took some great pictures. I cannot even describe the battle that took place, the hydra tried to play tricks on us, the floors were slanted, passageways were closed off, but we prevailed! We also scored some cool pictures.

Ok, with the hydra slain, we continued on our path to hike. Not soon after, we ran into a joint Buddhist and Shinto temple. It was huge and gorgeous. I wish we had architecture like this back home. I’ve always loved Eastern architecture, and this was perfect. The courtyard had beautiful statues and the main body of the temple was full of huge, elaborate artifacts. This temple also has the largest 3-story pagoda in all of Japan. Unfortunately, you can’t go inside. We all made some small donations and prayers to the gods, and moved on. Just check the pictures, which don’t nearly do justice to the ambience.

Ok, dragon-slain, temple-prayed at, all that was left was the mountain. It took us a good 45 minutes to climb to the top. It was a great hike. There isn’t much to explain, it was a hike, but we got a beautiful view from the top.

Afterwards, we drove to Gonohe to meet up with Seth, Helen, and Melissa for a little horsemeat dinner. How is horsemeat? It’s actually pretty good. It has a different flavor from meats you’ve had before. It’s like beef with extra flavor. It was actually really delicious. So we sat around and talked and ate. It was a great end to the day.

……but does the dragon still stir?

Your favorite, Random Japan:

The first time I was able to drive my car, I turned on the radio to get a taste of Japanese music:

Who's the black private dick
That's a sex machine to all the chicks?
(Shaft!)
You're damn right.

Japanese music is the theme from Shaft? Isaac Hayes, have you been lying to us this whole time? Or is it just that, at 7 in the morning on the way to work, the average Japanese listener really digs listening to the Isaac Hayes Marathon? Well, no complaints here.

Last week I needed a haircut. I drew a careful diagram as to how I wanted my hair to look. I think it was pretty good. After 30 minutes of careful cutting, I actually had a great trim. The barber was really exact, often making the most miniscule cuts to get it just right. And I thought I was done.

Not so. His wife comes from out of nowhere and somehow signals that she’s going to shampoo my hair. So far so good, right? I’m getting a nice wash, she dries my hair, puts in obscene amounts of tonic (which shall henceforth be called, head-burninating solution) and began to apply lather.

Good, I’ll get a shave for the back of my hair, sort of like when I got my hair cut at Puglisi in DC. Again, totally normal. Then, she lathers my cheeks. Hey, a full shave, even better, I’ve never had this before! Then, she lathers my neck. Still totally normal. Then, she lathers my…ears? Ok, shave the outside of my ears, I never liked my peach-fuzz there anyways! Then she lathers my…forehead? What are you pulling on me you crazy old woman?! I know I don’t have hair on my forehead. I don’t even have peach-fuzz. What are you doing? Up, no time to think, she put warm towels on my face. Very comfortable warm towels. I could just fall asleep.

Oh, it’s over? That’s too bad, I was just getting into the groove. Are you sure there isn’t still some hair on my ears somewhere? Ah well, it was good while it lasted. It was a good hour-long trip to the barbershop. I can’t wait to go again.